understanding and managing anger

Anger, like many of our responses, is intensely complex; and yet there is something very simple that sits beneath it all. All creatures have a flight or fight mechanism, it's Natures way of saying "I'd like to keep you around for a while longer". In the article on fear we saw how this fight and flight response caused us to attempt to flee from the 'thing' before us. However, anger is when we choose to respond to a threat by fighting and not running.

The 'voice' of anger is unimportant, all animals will scream and shout when they are cornered and fearful; what is important is the stance of 'to fight' and why it is adopted at that moment.

Ask yourself, when you get angry what is stopping you from walking away from the moment; what is it that forces you to take a stance, to fight back? Because the answer to that will underpin your ability to manage your anger, and you may find that you are actually justifiably angry because there is no way out of the situation.

Anger is hurt and we can feel hurt in many ways whether it be our past, or feeling unloved and misunderstood. You need to know that you can choose to respond differently, you can choose to only display appropriate anger in an appropriate way; if you understand the mechanics of why you felt the need to fight and not flee, in the first place.